Kink Odyssey – September 19 – 22, 2019

Here’s a weekend to satisfy your desires for kink play – and more. Whether you are drawn to spanking, bondage, power exchange, tickling, flogging, water sports or other BDSM activities – whether you consider yourself a top, bottom, switch, or just curious – this is a safe place to let your fantasies come alive. If you’re a veteran player, you have a special opportunity here to help men who are eager but less experienced. Easton Mountain is the retreat center devoted to providing gay men with opportunities to celebrate, heal, transform, and integrate body, mind, and spirit. This is a place where you can come to know yourself and to develop authentic relationships. On this weekend you will focus on developing self-knowledge and genuine relationships through kink play. On this weekend Easton Mountain provides all that you expect from a BDSM run – a well-equipped dungeon space along with interactive workshops to learn, share and practice a variety of kink related activities and skills – plus the unique camaraderie that is associated with Easton Mountain. Kink Odyssey will begin with dinner Thursday and will end after lunch on Sunday. Bring a willing attitude and a curious spirit. Leather, rubber, boots, and other fetish wear are encouraged. Bring your toys! This is a great place to bring out your kinky self!

Click here for more information about the weekend and Easton Mountain!

The Reality of Kink and Porn

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I was a part of a wonderful discussion last night for The Leatherman’s Discussion Group.  It was fun walking down memory lane with Dirk Caber.  Click to watch the Video.

Kink Odyssey–June 14-17, 2018

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Click on the banner for more information about the weekend.

Here’s a weekend to satisfy your desires for kink play – and more. Whether you are drawn to spanking, bondage, power exchange, tickling, flogging, water sports or other BDSM activities – whether you consider yourself a top, bottom, switch, or just curious – this is a safe place to let your fantasies come alive. If you’re a veteran player, you have a special opportunity here to help men who are eager but less experienced. Easton Mountain is the retreat center devoted to providing gay men with opportunities to celebrate, heal, transform, and integrate body, mind, and spirit. This is a place where you can come to know yourself and to develop authentic relationships. On this weekend you will focus on developing self-knowledge and genuine relationships through kink play.

On this weekend Easton Mountain provides all that you expect from a BDSM run – a well equipped dungeon space along with interactive workshops to learn, share and practice a variety of kink related activities and skills – plus the unique camaraderie that is associated with Easton Mountain. Kink Odyssey will begin with dinner Thursday and will end after lunch on Sunday. Bring a willing attitude and a curious spirit. Leather, rubber, boots, and other fetish wear are encouraged. Bring your toys! This is a great place to bring out your kinky self!

Kink Odyssey welcomes all men who love men, including trans-men who are living and presenting as male.

The schedule is currently being finalized. Here are some of the activities and workshops we’ve had in the past:

Cock and Ball Play
Foot, Socks and Boot Fetishes
Outdoor Cigar and Bootblack Party
Puppy Play
Mummification
Flogging
Spanking
Erotic Rope Bondage
Scene Construction & Role Play
Water Sports Party
Introduction to Sounding
Kink Imagination

plus plenty of time for play.

Kinky Porn With Paul Wilde

Join me (aka Paul Wilde) for a firsthand look inside the gay porn industry and its ever-changing relationship to kink. We’ll explore what goes on behind the camera, the fantasy of what we see in porn versus the reality of what we do in the playroom, and common misconceptions kinky porn creates.  We’ll even examine how kinky porn is evolving from a commercial product into an authentic expression of an individual’s sexuality while Paul offers tips on how to improve your own videos.

Wednesday, June 27, 2018
7:30 PM  9:30 PM
Mr. S Leather Studio (map)

Lube 101

Lube 101

lube-assortI was walking through the store today and was amazed to see an entire wall dedicated to personal lubricants.  Granted, I was in a sex shop in the heart of the Castro.  There were so many choices: silicone, flavored, scented, water, jo, anal, organic, for couples, warming, cooling, gel, creme, paste, hybrid, super slick, and so on.  It was overwhelming.  Unless you know what you’re looking for, where do you start?

There are three basic categories of lube:  water-based, silicone based, and oil based.  Each type has its pluses and minuses.  One may be better suited to a specific activity than another.  Graze the buffet.  Try out something different.  You might find a new favorite or confirm your favorite really is the best.

Water based:
These lubes are usually comprised of water and glycerin, although there are glycerin-free alternatives. These lubes can be used with any type of condom, toy, and clothing. They dissolve in soap and water, so cleanup is a breeze.  You don’t end up with fabric stains, permanently slick floors, or handprints on the wall that never go away.  The downside is you need to reapply lube or water frequently because they dry out and become sticky.

Silicone based:
These lubes are a blend of different silicone liquids.  By varying the ratios, manufacturers get different viscosities (thicknesses) in the product. Silicone lubes are recommended for used with latex products and most silicone products.  Silicone does not dissolve in water.  It also doesn’t dry out and takes longer to get sticky.  There are silicone hybrids that combine water and silicone.  The hybrids are popular because they combine the best properties of the two and look a lot like cum.

You need to be cautious when combining silicone lubes and silicone toys.  The silicone lube might bond to the toy creating a sticky mess that has to be scraped off the toy.  I’ve ruined a number of toys this way.  Apply a small amount to the base or flange of the toy.  The reaction is immediate.  If the lube stays slick, you’re good to go.  If it’s gooey, you should switch to a different lube or toy.

The downside is silicone is tough to clean up. Stained fabrics are nearly a given, so most guys have a set of sheets or drop cloth to use when having sex.  It’s difficult to get all of the silicone lube off hard surfaces like floors or bathtubs.  Dawn dish detergent helps with toys and Windex works on hard surfaces to a degree.

Oil based:
Oil based lubes are derived from petroleum or rendered fat.  These lubes should not be used with any type of latex product (condoms, toys, clothing) because they break down the latex. Polyurethane condoms and silicone toys aren’t affected.  Most people tend to dismiss oil based lubes rather quickly, but they can be a good choice for some activities.  Masturbation and butt play come to mind immediately.

Oil based lubes tend to be slicker than other lubes and extremely long lasting.  This type of lube also adheres well to skin and the rectal walls.  The obvious drawback is these lubes corrode latex.  Most of the time, these lubes are packaged in a tub, so it’s easy to contaminate the container during play.  Fabric stains are typical and shower is usually the best way to clean yourself up. Finally, these lubes can go rancid over time.

Additives:
All lubes have additives for one reason or another.  Some of the most common are preservatives, scents, emollients,  numbing agents, colors, flavors, warming agents, and cooling agents. While all are FDA approved, that doesn’t mean a few people aren’t sensitive to one additive or another.  If you have a reaction (rash, burning, etc), switch to another lube.  It’s not prevalent these days, but also avoid lubes that contain nonoxynol-9.   It can irritate mucus membranes causing microscopic tears.

 

 

SF Workshop on Cock Massage

Pleasures from the Edge: Taking your Time with Cock Massage
massage-postJuly 23, 2016
12:30 to 6:30pm
EROS 2051 Market Street

Pre-register at https://www.eventbrite.com/e/pleasures-from-the-edge-taking-your-time-with-cock-massage-tickets-25861251700

Tired of the same old quick up-and-down? Learn how to maximize and prolong  your partner’s pleasure using cock massage in a way that will blow his mind.

Join Chris and Paul for an afternoon in which we’ll introduce you to over a dozen cock  pleasuring strokes from the worlds of Tantra and Daoist Erotic Massage. These schools consider this work to be a healing modality, but these techniques are a great form of foreplay, or even the main event in your play.

We’ll give you some background on these techniques and demonstrate how to use them. We’ll also give you tips on how to be more present in your body, prolong your partner’s pleasure, and connect more deeply with your partner so you get the most out of your experience. After a short break, you get some hands-on practice giving and receiving while we guide you through it providing help and advice.

Come with a partner or meet someone to work with at the workshop. You’ll be working on the floor, so bring something comfortable to lie on, such as a yoga mat and beach towel.

All adult men with a sincere interest in learning this material are welcome, regardless of age, appearance, body type, or sexual orientation. Nobody has to participate in any exercises they don’t feel comfortable with.

Kink Odyssey – June 9-12, 2016

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Click on the banner for more information about the weekend.

Here’s a weekend to satisfy your desires for kink play – and more. Whether you are drawn to spanking, bondage, power exchange, tickling, flogging, water sports or other BDSM activities – whether you consider yourself a top, bottom, switch, or just curious – this is a safe place to let your fantasies come alive. If you’re a veteran player, you have a special opportunity here to help men who are eager but less experienced. Easton Mountain is the retreat center devoted to providing gay men with opportunities to celebrate, heal, transform, and integrate body, mind, and spirit. This is a place where you can come to know yourself and to develop authentic relationships. On this weekend you will focus on developing self knowledge and genuine relationships through kink play.

On this weekend Easton Mountain provides all that you expect from a BDSM run – a well equipped dungeon space along with interactive workshops to learn, share and practice a variety of kink related activities and skills – plus the unique camaraderie that is associated with Easton Mountain. Kink Odyssey will begin with dinner Thursday and will end after lunch on Sunday. Bring a willing attitude and a curious spirit. Leather, rubber, boots, and other fetish wear are encouraged. Bring your toys! This is a great place to bring out your kinky self!

Kink Odyssey welcomes all men who love men, including trans-men who are living and presenting as male.

The schedule is currently being finalized. Here are some of the activities and workshops:

Cock and Ball Play
Foot, Socks and Boot Fetishes
Outdoor Cigar and Bootblack Party
Puppy Play
Mummification
Flogging
Spanking
Erotic Rope Bondage
Scene Construction & Role Play
Water Sports Party
Introduction to Sounding
Kink Imagination

plus plenty of time for play.

What’s So Great About Kinky Sex?

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I was talking to someone the other day and he asked why kinky things like whips, ball stretchers, and hairy Daddies are so interesting when I’m having sex.  I’ve heard many general theories about kinkster headspace, but I’ve never thought about my own.  Here are several elements that make kinky play so satisfying to me on a personal level.  Many of them also apply to mainstream sex (which I enjoy a great deal!), but being in a scene ramps it up another notch or two.

BDSM play involves a deep intimacy that draws me back again and again. When I’m in a heavy scene with a familiar partner, we form an intense connection. It’s physical, emotional, and even spiritual at times.  There’s a flow of energy that moves between us that I can’t explain, but I certainly experience.  There’s a high level of trust.  I know my partner will keep me safe throughout the scene.  I may become uncomfortable on a variety of levels, but I know that my partner is watching out for me.

Kinky play gives me the opportunity to step out of my daily patterns and roles.  In my daily life, I prefer structure and a sense of control.  Kink allows me to explore other possibilities within a contained space.  I can submit a Dom and give him control over me.  He calls the shots and I seldom know where he will take me.  I can try out something new with my partner and not worry about getting the technique completely correct. Role-playing allows me to set aside logic, reason, and reality and immerse myself in fantasy.  I can be a wrestler or big brother or delivery guy.

Kink forces me to be present with my body.  I’m a very physical player and I draw my sexual energy from a primal place.  It’s a place that society usually demands we bury.  I can explore that raw, animalistic part of me. You will find me growling or grunting in the playroom when I’m in the groove.  It’s about unbridled response.

I’ve also found that stimulating different parts of my body elicits different emotional responses.  Paddling my hamstrings and calves ramps up the animal side of me while flogging or whipping my back is very centering and spiritual.  Fisting is a wonderful exploration of the nuances of subtle sensations.  All of these sensations/emotions are immediate and ephemeral. It’s there and then it’s gone.  There’s no time for me to mentally process anything…only the chance to experience it.

Kinky play gives me new insights about myself.  I can be pushed outside my comfort zone and confronted with new sensations.  Being completely immobilized triggers my desire for control.  How does it feel to not be in control? Single tailing gives me the change to explore how things really feel rather than how my head thinks they feel.  The stinging sensation from the whip isn’t nearly as painful as I thought it would be. Fisting reminds me to slow down and to savor each sensation.

Finally, I’ve embraced the fact I’m just wired for kinky sex.  There’s an erotic charge that comes from these intense sensations that seems automatic.  I’ll rise to the occasion every time if you’re squeezing my balls.  Use a paddle while we’re having sex and I’m in ecstasy. I enjoy non-kinky sex immensely, but adding in some kink has always been icing on my cake.

Flogging Workshop

Flogging for Beginnersfloggerdrop2

Flogging is one of the most recognized forms of impact play. It’s a physical and emotional tool that we can use to reach heightened states of excitement that border on catharsis. This workshop is an introduction to the art of flogging including: equipment, technique, processing sensations, safety, aftercare, communication, first steps, and more.

The workshop will be interactive, so anyone who wants to try out some techniques can do so in a safe, controlled environment.

TIME: Monday, May 9, 2016 from 7:30 to 9:30 p.m. Entry at 7 p.m.

LOCATION: Club Eros, 2051 Market Street, San Francisco

No pre-registration required. No charge. Attire: Street clothes; leather friendly. Men only.